Right here waiting
by Roadglide08
Summary: Addalyn left everything behind to follow him to Charming. One night changed it all. Can Juice get her back or is the damage irreparable. *not a good summary person, please read it will be worth it!* I own Addalyn everything else is all Kurt Sutter.
1. Chapter 1

She was all he ever thought about. Her honey blonde hair and bright green eyes haunted his every memory. It had been 8 months since he last saw her and he would sell his soul just to see her face in front of his. He could remember every inch of her, like she was still lying on his chest, tracing the outline of each tattoo that marked his flesh with her gentle finger tips.

He hated himself every second of every day for the way things ended, for the way he pushed her to their breaking point. He knew the moment the words slipped off his lips that it meant the end of "them." He never imagined he would be able to hurt her, She meant everything to him. She was all he had aside from his SAMCRO brothers. But, a lot of shit had gone down that night and he had been searching for a fight, someone to take his anger and sadness out on. Unfortunately, she happened to be the closest person and received the brunt of his fury. She was the only one he could share his deepest secrets and craziest dreams with and in one split second he had single handedly shattered her heart into a million pieces.

"Juicy, we gotta go lad, the Irish are waiting." Chibs called out down the long hallways lined with desolate dorm rooms. The Scotsman's voice rattled him from his thoughts. He grabbed his cut as he slid of the bed and headed out the door, but not before taking one last glance at the picture of her on his desk. The one remembrance of her he would never put away.

Addalyn started off on her journey home in the California night air after a long night of teaching dance. She was finally doing what she loved and made her dream of owning a dance studio a reality. She had also gotten lucky in the fact that the building she was leasing was only a few blocks from her house and she could walk to and from work every day.

She had fallen in love with Charming the moment they had motored into town. It was a quiet little town, far enough from the big city but close enough if she wanted to venture there. It was much like the town she grew up in before she moved to New York City for college and met him.

_Addalyn was all smiles. She couldn't wait for him to come home. It had only been a couple of months, but she was in love. His goofy sense of humor and that gigantic smile that made her face light up just looking at it. He was kind, caring and protective. Every time he walked into the door of her apartment her heart skipped a beat._

_He came rushing in the door and she smiled as she made her way to the door from her warm spot on the couch. Her smile immediately drained though when she noticed the look of distress and slight fear on his face._

_"Babe, what's wrong?" she moved to him slowly, afraid that he was hurt or angry._

_"I have to get out of here." His eyes darted at her and then to the door of her bedroom. He broke out in a light jog to the room, grabbed his bag and started throwing his things into it._

_"Babe!" she tried desperately to get his attention. He was scaring her and she couldn't comprehend what was happening._

_"Babe, what's going on? Are you ok? Why are you packing? Where are you going?" The questions just poured out of her mouth one after the other._

_He was still frantically tossing things around the room. Everything he had kept at her place was being shoved into the tiny duffle bag._

_She reached across him and grabbed his hands, briefly stopping his frantic actions. He stopped and looked up at her for the first time since he was burst through the door._

_"I have to get out of the City. Come with me." Her jaw hung ajar at his words. He was leaving and was asking her to come. "I can't tell you why right now, but if you come with me I promise I will tell you everything. I don't know where I'm going, but I have to get far away from here."_

_She just stared at him. The man she was in love with was leaving and she had to choose, pursuit her dreams of dance and finish college or leave with him, the man she wasn't sure she could live without._

_"Addie, I have to go like now. I love you and I want you to come with me, but I can't ask you to give up everything you have here for me." He hadn't told her he loved her yet, those words weren't exchanged although both had felt that way for a little while._

_It was like those words made it all clear to her, the decision she had to make. "Don't leave without me. Let me pack a few things, I'm coming with you."_

Their journey brought them all the way here and along the way she had found out everything he had been involved in back inNew York. She never once regretted her decision, even now while walking home alone.

She wasn't used to walking home alone in the dark, even after 8 months of doing it night after night. He used to be right there waiting for her with an extra helmet and if he had club business he ALWAYS made sure a prospect was there to take his place.

Those days, the days of being madly in love and anxiously waiting the next time they would see each other or hold each other, were in the past. She walked away from him and everything they had together that night. He wasn't the man she had fallen in love with, it was almost as if he was a stranger.

The eerie silence of the night still got to her. She didn't like it, it left her to her thoughts and those were dangerous. They always brought her back to him. His dark brown eyes, always freshly shaved Mohawk and face, strong, toned arms and caramel skin. Those strong arms wrapped around her, always touching her any chance he got. She hated that even after all this time, even after the pain he caused, she still missed him more than she would ever admit to anyone, including herself.

She was there during his prospect days, all the hours and days they were apart because being apart of that club meant everything to him. She celebrated with him when he was patched in. The 1000 watt smile that no one could wipe off his face that day, even if they tried, still flashed through her mind. The small crow with JCO that marked her lower left hip permanently was a daily reminder of how much of herself was still invested in that man. But, it didn't matter anymore. She was trying to move on with her life without him.

The roar of motorcycles in the distance brought her back to reality. She entered her house, their house, alone for what felt like the millionth night in a row. They had settled in this smaller house together, but after their fight he never came back. One night when she came home from work his stuff was gone. It was now her home, no longer one she shared with anyone. She threw her bag down and let out an audible sigh. Regardless of the hurt, she still missed everything about him.


	2. Chapter 2

*Thanks for the reviews! Just to clear up some confusion, this is a continuing story, not a one shot. I've got the first couple chapters written so update should come pretty frequently. Also, this doesn't really follow the time line of the show. There will be a few references to actual events but this is mainly about Juice and Addalyn's relationship, with some twists, turns and suspense along the way. Thanks for reading and please, let me know what you think! I would love to hear from you guys as to what you want to see, don't want to see or just enjoy reading. Constructive criticism is welcomed too, just be gentle with me, I'm fairly new to this*

Addalyn leaned against the door frame and tried to wrestle all the thoughts of Juice out of her mind. She had tried to hold out hope for him. She longed for the day he would come back home, apologize for everything, tell her it was all a lie and kiss her. She waited six months for that, but it just never happened.  
The feel of vibrations in her pocket caused her to jump. She glanced down at her phone and felt herself lighten up a little, a small smile gracing her lips.

"Hey!" She answered rather cheerfully, somewhat surprising even herself. Scott was her new "thing". They had met at the dance studio when he had dropped his niece off for class one night. The two had hit it off almost right away. She wasn't sure what label to give him yet, they had been going out here and there for a couple of months, she wasn't sure she was ready for the boyfriend term yet.

"Hey, sweetheart. How was work?" He was always using terms of endearment with Addalyn. She knew he wanted to take what they had to the next level but she just wasn't sure her heart was ready, even though her head might be. Scott was the complete opposite of Juice. He was tall, blonde hair, blue eyes and a lawyer.

" It was great, got a lot of competition pieces finished."

"That's good, babe. You still want to catch that movie?" He asked sounding hopeful.

"Sure, just let me shower and stuff." She was exhausted, but knew that she had to get out of the house or else she would just continue to struggle with her past demons.

"Ok, I'll be there in about 20 minutes. Can't wait to see you."

"Ok, bye." Addalyn hung up and hurried off to the bathroom to get ready.

-

Juice was riding his Dyna back from the meet with the Irish at the warehouse. He was alone, he told his brothers he was going for a ride. They had all noticed that for the past eight months he just existed. He was sad, quiet and lonely. Sure, he had taken advantage of a few crow-eaters advances, but he was just going through the motions. It was ridiculous to him that one woman could effect his entire life.

He had finally decided this would be the night he would see Addalyn again. He couldn't take the aching in his chest and the emptiness in his bed. He knew she wouldn't just jump back into things, but he at least wanted her to hear him out, maybe he could convince her if he apologized enough.

He was surprised he hadn't run into her, but he had been doing everything in his power to avoid places he knew she would be. He rarely left the clubhouse if he wasn't out on club business.

He rounded the corner of the familiar street and spotted the house, their house. He saw a shadowy figure coming out of the front door and felt a twinge in his chest the moment he laid eyes on her. His eyes darted to where she was headed, she was about to get into a strange car. He made his way slowly past the front of the house and caught a glimpse of her smiling at the figure in the white Audi A6. He continued past, noticing the figure in the car was a man before locking eyes with her. She was just as beautiful as he remembered. He revved the engine and sped off out of sight. Rage filled him at the thought of her smiling that way, the way she used to at him, at another man.

-

She spotted him coming down the road. She had heard the bike approaching from the distance and out of habit glanced at the driver. Her breath hitched in her throat when she spotted the Dyna. She would know it anywhere; it was her main transportation for a few years. Then she spotted the glasses, the ones he always wore while night riding and felt her heart nearly leap out of her chest. She hadn't laid eyes on him since that fateful night and he chose the moment she was going out on a date with Scott to drive past.

Addalyn tried to shrug it off, she didn't want to make something out of nothing and Scott knew nothing of her previous relationship. She got into Scott's car and tried her best to pretend she didn't even notice the bike, the man on it or the pang in her chest.

-

He caressed her hair, pulling the tie from it so that her long locks could cascade down her shoulders and back. Their hands were all over each other and clothes were strewn across the room. She had on her special bra and panties, the pink leopard matching set that she knew was his favorite. He rested on top of her, his gaze darting up and down her slim figure and took in the site that was underneath him. She giggled as he got that goofy look on his face and he couldn't get enough of the sound. He had missed everything about her.

She ran her hands over his Mohawk and down his toned back, lightly dragging her fingernails as she went. He closed his eyes and a low moan escaped from deep in his throat before he devoured her lips again, this time his hands rapidly removing the remaining material that separated them. As he sank into her she slowly said his name, the pleasure clear in her voice.

"mmmm…. Juan"

He loved the way it sounded, the way she never called him Juice like everyone else in Charming did. He was always Juan to her, no matter what.

He looked into her eyes, almost unable to control his pace, he had been yearning for this moment. "I love you Addalyn."

Just as she opened her mouth to answer him he whipped his head off the pillow to a loud pounding on his door.

"Juice, c'mon man, Clay called church right now. Let's go!" Tig shouted, pounding relentlessly as he hopped up and pulled a shirt over his head.

Juice looked around the room, he was all alone. It had all been a dream, the same dream he had been having every night for eight months.


	3. Chapter 3

*Thank you everyone for your reviews, favorites and follows! It makes me very happy and motivates me to keep writing! To answer a question- I guess this would take place during seasons 1 and 2. It won't be directly related to those season, but will reference some events that occurred. Thank you so much again, please don't forget to review and let me know what you guys think!*

A few days had passed since their so-called "encounter." Addalyn had tried persistently to forget about Juice's "drive-by". She had an enjoyable time with Scott, she always did, and normally she would be looking forward to the next time she would see him but this time was different. Her mind was flooded with thoughts as to why Juice had ridden by the house, what he was trying to accomplish.

She thought about calling him, asking if everything was alright. She was worried maybe something happened to his family back in New York and that was the purpose of his "visit", but she knew he changed burners like he changed underwear and the last number she had was from months ago. There was no way of knowing and no way of finding out unless she confronted him and that was definitely not going to happen. She was not going to seek him out.

Scott could tell that something had been off with her that night, he kept asking her if everything was alright. He was sweet, he cared about her and she could sense that. He was the smart choice, the kind of guy she was meant to be with. She needed to keep telling herself that. Juice's appearance had made her think about what she was doing, why she was holding out on Scott for him. He had waited eight months to emerge, and even then just kept on going without so much as a nod. Yea, their eyes had met but she could see the hardness in them all the way from the front step. Why should she keep waiting, hoping and praying that he would come around when she had a perfectly good man who wanted to be with her.

She locked the front door behind her and headed to the studio, praying that work would keep her mind off of everything else, even just for a few hours.

Juice still knew her schedule. She was at the studio every night until 9:30 but tonight he knew was her early night, she would be home by 8:15. Juice still knew everything about her. His hacking skills always came in handy.

The replay of seeing her, the man in the car and her smile kept flashing through his brain and anger began to fill him again. He had lost her, he knew she was not his anymore but a part of him still thought of her that way. He thought about giving up, letting her go from his mind once and for all but he knew he couldn't do that. He just wouldn't be able to. He still loved her more than he would ever admit to himself.

flashback~

She snatched the keys out of his hand and ran to the front door. He knew she was excited but didn't know she would be this excited. She was squealing like a school girl as she slid the key into the lock and popped the door open. He watched her from the front step rush into the house and twirl around in the living room.

They had bought their first house together. He was patched in to the club almost a year ago and they were finally moving out of the clubhouse. She hated living there, she always complained about waking up in the morning, going to the kitchen and seeing the puke on the floor or naked crow-eaters strung out on the couch. He had finally saved up enough money for them to have a place of their own, their first place together.

"C'mon babe!" She shouted to him from inside the house somewhere. He stepped into the house and looked around for her, finding her in the biggest of the three bedrooms.

"This is definitely my room, you can have one of the smaller rooms." She looked at him, trying to keep a straight face.

"Oh, you don't want to share with me? Maybe I'll just go back to the clubhouse then." He chuckled as he approached her, grabbing her by the hips and pulling her to him. Her shirt slid up and he caught a glimpse of the small crow with his initials. He leaned in and pressed his lips to hers, gently at first, while running his thumb along the tattoo. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him even closer to her.

She pulled back a minute and looked into his eyes. He loved looking into her green eyes, he always found comfort in them no matter what he had just done. "Are we going to christen this room already?" She questioned while running her fingers up and down the back of his neck.

He didn't answer her with his words, but he didn't need to. He pushed her against the wall and ran his hands up her sides, pulling her shirt up with them as he went.

end flashback~

He felt his heart sink lower in his chest at the thought. He couldn't just let her waltz right into some other guys arms. Sure, he had waited eight months and she could have been with other guys between then and now, but he needed to apologize to her at the very least. Let her know everything he said that night was a lie.

There was a party at the clubhouse. They were celebrating the patch in of some of the prospects, Big Phil and V-Lin. He knew he would be able to get away without the guys noticing.

He made his way to the bar, he needed a little bit of liquid courage before he did this. He took a seat next to Bobby, who was already indulging in the whiskey.

"It's been a long time, Juicy. Addalyn is gone, you need to move on. The club needs your head clear, focusing on club shit not pussy." The older man tipped back the shot glass and downed it in one gulp before slamming the glass back on the bar.

"I'm fine, man. It's all good." Juice lied, but knew his words were hard to believe when his eyes told a different story.

"She was a great girl, man, but life goes on. You fucked up, it is what it is. You gotta get her out of your head man. There will be plenty of free pussy here tonight. Just relax and enjoy yourself." Bobby looked over at Juice before downing another shot.

Juice just nodded his head in response. He took another swig of his beer and stood up. Bobby had no idea what Juice was going through. Addalyn was not just pussy and he wouldn't be able to relax until he saw her again.

Addalyn locked up the studio doors. She was headed home, alone once again. She hadn't talked to Scott, even though he attempted to call her numerous times. She was sick of doing this dance with him. He was clear with what he wanted and she needed time to decide if she was ready for that. It wasn't fair to him.

Her head was pounding, it had been pretty much since the night Juice had driven by. She was just exhausted mentally and needed a break from everything. Dance was the only thing that made her truly happy these days.

She was so entranced in her thoughts that she didn't notice his bike parked on the curb in front. She was zoned out. She dug around her bag for her keys, not lifting her head until she had found them and was just about to the door. She moved to step up the step and gasped, jumping back and almost falling down. The man she had been thinking about every night on her walk home alone was sitting on the front step of their house.

He looked up at her. Her honey blonde hair just as he remembered it, pulled back into a pony tail. Her bright green eyes shining in the moonlight, they never could be dulled. She had on a pair of black yoga pants and a tight fitting turquoise blue exercise top. She was still as gorgeous as the first day he saw her.

Addalyn struggled to speak. Her nerves at this point were shot. All the thinking about him, wondering what she would say if she ever had the chance to speak to him, came crashing in on her this very moment. She tried to piece words together but nothing would come out. Her brain was malfunctioning.

Juice saw the look of nervousness on her face. "Um… Hi." He mustered out. He hadn't thought this far ahead yet, he had always been stuck on just seeing her again.

She took a step back. "Hi." Her eyes darted from the ground to his face. She wasn't sure what to do here. Invite him in? Tell him to leave? She was at a loss.

It was then that she noticed him, really noticed him. His strong arms resting on his knees as he sat on the step. His t-shirt hugging all the right muscles, just enough so she could see the outlines. He was just as irresistible as she remembered. But she couldn't let herself go there, he had caused too much pain and she had to keep remembering that as she looked at him.

"Look Addie," his nickname for her sparked a jolt in her heart. She hadn't been called that in a long time, he was the only one who ever said it and honestly she missed the way it sounded. "I came by because I needed to see you. To tell you I'm sorry for everything." It was like word vomit pouring out of his mouth. He had so much he wanted to say and didn't know how to say it.

Addalyn listened to him. She didn't know how to respond. As much as she had thought about this moment, she couldn't believe it was actually happening. Her mind flashed to that night.

Flashback~

They stood out on the front lawn yelling like a couple of idiots. Juice had come home from a run and Addalyn was waiting for him on the couch. She made one little comment about him being gone and he went off on her.

"You're an asshole. What is your problem?" Addalyn yelled from the front step. Juice was getting ready to climb on his bike. He was leaving.

"You know what, Addalyn? I don't want you anymore. I'm just not an "old man" kinda guy. You know that what happens on a run stays on a run rule? Well that has applied to every run I've gone on." He lied. He knew it would hurt her. They had discussed that rule when he was patched in. She told him she wouldn't tolerate cheating, stupid rule or not.

Addalyn felt like she had been suckered punched in the stomach. They had been together for 3 years and he was always sweet and caring. Tonight it had changed and she wasn't sure why. She felt the tears well up in her eyes and turned her back on him. Not giving him the satisfaction of seeing her pain. She walked into the house, closed the door behind her and slid down to her knees. Her cries came harder as she heard his bike start up and speed away.

end flashback~


	4. Chapter 4

* I can't thank you all enough for your reviews, favs and follows! It means a lot to me that you guys are enjoying this story so far. Just a side note, I know I said this story takes place around seasons 1-2 but I mentioned Big Phil and V Lin patching in, for the purpose of this story they come into play earlier than they do in the show. Thanks again guys, please let me know what you think it definitely keeps me motivated :) *

"Do you want to come in?" She looked down at him, stunned by her invite. She couldn't believe herself.

He nodded. He stood up and stepped aside, allowing her to unlock the door and let them both in. He looked around; it was just as he remembered. Nothing had changed. He still owned this house, but thought it would be better to just let Addalyn live there instead of forcing her to find a place on her own.

She put her stuff down next to the couch and made her way into the kitchen. Juice followed her, not sure where to sit. She pulled out a chair at the kitchen table and Juice followed suit.

Addalyn wasn't sure what to call him. She used to always call him Juan when it was just the two of them, but making sure to call him Juice in front of his brothers. She didn't feel like they were on that level anymore, even though he had already called her by his nickname for her.

"Juice, I don't really know what to say here. It's been a long time since we've seen each other. Then the ride by the other night and now you sitting on the step. I'm not sure what's going on."

He cringed at her calling him Juice. It meant she wasn't opening up to him at all.

"Addie, I just came by to tell you the truth. It's been haunting me for eight months and I need to clear the air."

Addalyn just looked at him, her eyes urging him to continue. She wanted to hear what he could possibly have to say about what really happened that night.

"That night, we came back from the run to SAMTAZ. I was angry and confused, Addie. I killed someone, my first time murdering a man and watching him die. Things didn't go down the way they were supposed to and Mayans showed up. I was in a crazed state of mind. I didn't know how to handle it. I took it out on you because you were the closest person to me."

Addalyn just sat there listening. She knew something had gone down, she had never seen him act like that especially towards her.

"I didn't mean anything I said. I never once cheated on you, on a run or not. You were everything to me. I knew that once the words slipped out that you would never want me back, that's why I never came home."

She wasn't sure if she should believe him. The man she once knew would never have cheated on her, but that night he wasn't the man she knew at all. All these emotions and truths spilling out of him were almost too much to bare.

"But you should've come home, Juice. You should have tried to explain it to me instead of letting eight months go by and then show up and try. I've moved on with my life." She sat there contemplating her words. Should she have said that? What if she wanted a chance to make it work with him again? Would he take off like he did before?

"I know, Addie. I'm sorry. After I left I wasn't sure how to come back after that. Then I never heard from you and I knew you were done. So I just gave up." He thought about the last words she said, she had moved on. "Are you seeing that guy whose car you were getting into the other night?"

She didn't know if she should tell him the truth. She didn't want him to think he had the opportunity to slip back in so easily, but all her feelings for him were hitting her like a ton of bricks.

"I've been seeing him, yes." She didn't need to indulge that she wasn't sure about her relationship with Scott or that they weren't even official. He needed to know she didn't wait around for him and he wasn't on her mind all the time, even if he was.

"Oh…." Was all he could reply. He was crazy to think she would be waiting for him with open arms, but he hoped the option was at least still there.

Juice stood up to leave. He had said everything he needed to get out and wasn't sure what more could be done.

Addalyn followed him to the door. Her head was spinning, partly from the incessant pounding and partly from the weight of everything he just dumped on her. As she stood by the door behind him she thought that this now may be the last time she saw him. She was confused and her heart was aching for the man that was standing in front of her.

Juice turned around and looked at her. He knew this may be his last shot at having anything with Addalyn again. He was stumped for words, so he did the only thing his heart was screaming for him to do, he grabbed her face in his hands and pressed his lips hard against hers.

Addalyn was in a state of shock and her mind froze but her body took over, she had craved this since he left her. Her hands immediately went to his cut and pulled him closer to her, deepening the kiss.

Their lips still interlocked, Juice took steps forwards, guiding her backwards towards the bedroom, their bedroom. He tried to move slowly, for one trying not to spook Addalyn and two waiting for any sign that this is not what she wanted. She never once stopped him and he took that sign as a go ahead.

Once they reached the bedroom Juice stopped her just before the edge of the bed. He pulled away from her and stared intently into her eyes. They were full of want and desire, he knew that look well. He slid his cut off before reaching over and pulling her top off. She had a sports bra on and was still in her yoga pants. He didn't think it was possible that he ever wanted her more then he did at that very moment. He kicked his shoes off before grasping her hips and pulling her into him. He pushed her back just far enough so the back of her knees hit the bed and she fell backwards.

The feel of his want for her against her pelvis was all she needed to continue whatever this was that was happening. She was in a whirlwind. Her hands moved to the edge of his shirt and lifted. They broke their connection only long enough to get his shirt and her bra off. Her hands instantly went to his chest, she missed the feeling of it underneath her slim fingers.

Juice moved his hands down to the top of her pants and in one swift motion pulled them off along with her panties. He was afraid she would change her mind and was doing everything he could to not let that happen. His rough, calloused hands went to her breasts and feeling them on her caused a moan to escape her lips. It had been a while since anyone had touched her, let alone made her feel like this.

Her fingers made their way to his belt buckle and she fumbled around to remove it. He removed his hands from her body only long enough to slide his pants and boxers down his legs and kick them to the floor.

There was no messing around tonight, this was all about making love to Addalyn and showing her how much she means to him. His lips went back to her but not before making their assault on her neck. She arched her back into him and he knew he had hit her sensitive spot.

He leaned up on his elbows and steadied himself. As he entered her he gazed into her eyes and could thought for a second he saw a flicker of hope for them. He made sure to move slowly at first, he could feel that she hadn't been with anyone in a while and he hoped it was him that was the last one there. She moved her hands to his back, pulling her into him and he took that as a nod to pick up the pace.

He moved back and forth, quickening the pace every time he pulled out. He could tell by her facial expressions that her release was building. He was close to and knew that if she let go he would be right after her. As he moved in and out of her he shifted his lips back to the sensitive spot on her neck again. That was all it took, she lost it.

"Ohhhh, Juice!" She called out. A part of him broke at her not calling him Juan but he couldn't focus on that as his release hit him. "Shit, Addie" he grunted as he collapsed on top of her.

He waited a minute before rolling over and lying next to her. He was unsure of what to do. He didn't know if Addalyn would want him to leave. He moved to roll over and get out of bed when he felt her hands grab his wrist.

"Stay," she paused waiting for his reaction "please?"

He smiled slightly and nodded but on the inside he felt like his heart was going to explode. Maybe there was hope after all.


	5. Chapter 5

Addalyn stirred from her comfortable position of a warm body against her and strong arms wrapped around her. The snoring in her ear was deafening and then it hit her. HE was in her bed. The memories of the previous night flooded her mind as she remembered exactly why he was still in bed with her.

Sure, she had asked him to stay and wanted what happened to happen, but the repercussions of the morning after never crossed her mind. She lifted the arm he had wrapped around her up and slid out from underneath him and out of the bed. She tip toed to the bathroom and tenderly closed the door behind her. Turning on the light she stared at herself in the mirror "Oh Addalyn, what did you get yourself into?"

Her mind raced while in there. She couldn't let him back in that easily. How did she know it wouldn't happen again? Especially if he thought every time something happened he could just waltz back in, have sex with her and everything would be ok.

And what about Scott? She liked him, but was she ready to give up Juice completely to be with him. He was everything Juice wasn't. The main part being he was a law abiding citizen and she never really had to worry if he would come home in one piece. If he would come home with a bullet or stab wound, or worse, wondering if he would come home to her at all.

She snuck back out of the bathroom and saw Juice still snuggled in bed, snoring away. The sight made her giggle a little, it was typical of him. Nothing ever woke him up. She stood there for a second taking it in, thinking this was how her life used to be. She sighed and headed for the kitchen to do the only thing she could do when she was stressed… eat!

Juice woke up to the sweet smell of pancakes wafting up his nose. He smiled when he realized where he was, he was home. The events of the previous night replayed and he remembered how much he had missed feeling Addalyn's body against his. He sat up and slid his boxers on before following the aroma to the kitchen.

The sight before him was one he didn't realize how much he had missed until it was right in front of him. Standing in front of the stove, her back to him, Addalyn had nothing but a pair of short boy shorts on and one of his old SAMCRO t-shirts he must have left behind. She was perfect and he wanted to come back and wake up to this every morning.

He approached her from behind and enveloped her in his arms. The reaction he was expecting was a lot different then the one he received. He felt her body tense up and he stepped away.

"Everything ok?" He questioned as she turned around. He searched her face for any sign of emotion.

"Yea…" she paused "um actually, no. Not really." She made her way over to the table and pulled out a chair. Juice stayed in his position next to the stove.

"I'm not really sure…"

"Addie," Juice cut her off. "I did the only thing I could think of last night. I wanted you, wanted to show you how sorry I really am. I waited for a sign from you to stop. I didn't want to push but you never stopped me so I just kept going."

Addalyn shook her head "No, I wanted it to happen. I'm not blaming you for what happened last night. I made the decision to do it too. I just don't know what happens now. I can't just go back to the way things were. It just doesn't work like that after everything we've been through."

Juice opened his mouth to answer her, to explain to her that it could be that easy if she let it. If she would allow him to prove it to her that they could go back to the way it was, but he heard his phone ringing from the bedroom. He held his finger up, signaling for her to wait one second, and trailed the ringing.

Addalyn sighed again, she felt like that's all she had been doing lately. The incessant pounding in her head was starting to knock again, this time worse then last night. She stood up and headed to the medicine cabinet. She needed to take something to at least dull the ache.

She swallowed a couple of Advil Migraine's just as Juice came back into the kitchen, fully dressed this time and carrying his cut.

"I gotta run, clubshit. But can I come back tonight and we can finish this conversation?" He hoped she didn't notice the desperation in his voice.

"I have to work." She was trying to think of an excuse, she needed time to clear her mind and figure out what she really wanted. It was also supposed to be her weekly movie night with Scott. Should she tell Juice she had a date?

"I know, I can come by after that." He pleaded. She could see the look of fear on his face and hated that she was responsible for it.

"Um, ok, yea I guess so. I'm usually home by"

"10, I know. I remember." Juice cut her off. The look of surprise on her face had him chuckle slightly.

"Yea, 10." She couldn't believe he remembered. It wasn't like half the time he was home when she got back anyways.

"ok, I'll see you later." He leaned in and placed a quick kiss on her cheek before sliding his cut on and rushing out the door.

Addalyn was confused. She now had to decide what she wanted. It wasn't fair to Scott to keep him hanging if she decided to reconcile with Juice. Her head and her heart were telling her two different things. She needed to decide which devil she was going to listen to.

Her appetite had subsided, she just couldn't find it in her to eat. She tossed all the pancakes in the garbage and headed for the shower. She needed time alone and hoped the hot water would help her through the cloud of confusion.

Addalyn was dreading this. She had already called Scott and cancelled their plans. He kept questioning her about what was wrong. She couldn't find it in her heart to tell him the truth, not over the phone anyways. She also wanted to have this conversation with Juice before she made any decision to end things with Scott for good.

She locked up the studio, wishing the night had gone by much slower then it actually had, and headed home. It was like everything was in fast forward, her walk home had seemed much quicker than usual. Then she spotted him, perched on the step almost exactly as the night before. Her heart raced. She still hadn't decided to let him back into her life or not, but she didn't have much longer to decide.

"Hey." He said first. The street light shined on her face and for the first time he noticed the exhaustion on it. He felt bad knowing he may be the cause of it.

"Hey." She gave him a small smile. She slid the key into the door and held it open behind her, giving him the sign to follow her inside.

Addalyn tossed her stuff on the floor next to the couch and sat down on the arm. She wasn't sure what to say so she decided to speak first.

"Juice, it took me a long time to move on from you. In fact, I never truly did move on. Scott is a great guy and I don't want to hurt him. I need to know what you want, what happened last night… what did it mean? I'm mentally exhausted. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since the day you left me here alone. You hurt me, a part of me left that day with you and I've never been able to get it back." The words just spewed from her mouth. She couldn't believe she was spilling her feelings, she didn't want him to know how much she missed him, but on the other hand, she wanted him to know how much he had hurt her.

Juice just stood there, he didn't expect her to spill all of that to him. He tried to gather his thoughts before he spoke.

"Addie, I'm so sorry. I haven't been myself since we split. All I do is think about you, dream about you. I mean, shit, you haunt my every thought, awake or asleep. I want you back, I want to be us again. I don't know how to be me without you." He closed the distance between them. He was waiting for her reply, not realizing he was holding his breath while waiting.

"It's just not that easy, Juice. I want us to be that way again too, but it's going to take time. I'm not sure I can trust you fully yet." Addalyn wanted to be with him, but her head was winning the war between it and her heart.

Juice nodded "I'll show you, Addie. I'll prove that you can trust me. Just let me."

Before she could respond Juice grabbed her face, much like the night before, and kissed her. This time she could feel the passion. Everything they had once had between them was all being felt in this kiss.

Her mind became foggy and she found herself grabbing his cut and pulling him down on top of her on the couch. Whenever their bodies collided she just couldn't do anything to stop it, no matter how much her brain screamed at her to stop.

Little did either of them know they were about to have a visitor. One who had noticed the lights on and the bike out front and was headed in to get some answers from Addalyn.


	6. Chapter 6

*this chapter is a little bit of fluff/filler. Thank you again for all the reviews and favs and follows. It really does motivate me, even when I'm not up to it!

By the way I'm still REELING from last nights finale. I think I'm in a state of shock. I knew what happened was a possibility but never truly thought it would happen like that. I really was left breathless, just as Maggie Siff promised in her pre-finale interview. *

The pounding on the door stopped the two dead in their tracks. Addalyn wasn't expecting anyone and no one knew Juice was there. Addalyn moved to get up and tried to push Juice off of her, it was somewhat of a good thing that they were interrupted because she couldn't let her desire for him overcome her for the second night in a row.

Juice watched as Addalyn headed for the door. He wasn't sure what to do, but kept his hand near his gun just in case.

Addalyn looked through the peep hole. "Shit." she muttered.

Juice gave her a confused look. "Just give me a minute, ok?" Addalyn hadn't planned on letting Scott in but she knew he was there and had most likely seen the bike parked out front.

She opened the door and scooted outside as fast as she could before either man could notice each other.

"Scott, what's up? Everything ok?" She stuttered nervously. She knew she had to tell him the truth and let him down easily, but didn't want to have the burden of it tonight after everything that was already going on inside.

"Want to tell me what's been going on lately, Addalyn? You've been avoiding my calls and then you cancel on me tonight. I came by to make sure you were ok, but I see you may have company?" Scott raised his voice at her.

Shit, he had noticed the bike. "Listen, Scott. I just need some time. An old friend popped back into my life and I need to figure some things out."

Juice had heard the boisterous voice and was afraid Addalyn may be in danger. He opened the front door and made his presence known.

"Everything ok here, Addie?" He recognized the man standing on the step as the man Addalyn got into the car with the week before.

"Who is this? Really, Addalyn, a Son? He's your so called old friend?" He looked Juice up and down before giving Addalyn a disgusted look.

"Juice, just go back inside please." This was not the way she pictured this going down. Things were getting out of hand.

Juice just stared at her, ignoring her request. He wasn't sure what this guy was capable of.

"Scott, you don't know what you're talking about. Just please, calm down. I will explain everything to you, just not now." She placed her hand on his arm, trying anything to get him to leave.

"You don't need to explain, I think it's pretty clear. You're a biker whore. I thought maybe you were different than the other sluts in this town, but apparently I was wrong,"

That was all Juice needed to hear. Who the hell did this asshole think he was talking to her like that? He took a step forward, trying to shield Addalyn from what he was about to do. He clenched his fist until his knuckles turned white, reared back and connected with Scotts nose.

Addalyn let out a scream before trying desperately to step in between the two men. Scott was bent over, holding his nose which was already gushing blood.

"Juice, just go back inside!" She screamed at him. "I'm so sorry, Scott. Let me get you something to stop the bleeding." She reached out for his arm.

"Don't fucking touch me. This isn't over Addalyn." He looked back at her and Juice before making his way back to his car.

Addalyn pushed her way past Juice into the house. He followed her in and closed the door behind him when she turned around and stared at him.

"What the hell? You can't just go around beating the shit out of people, Juice! I told you to go back inside, I would have handled it."

"Addie, that guy was an asshole. I wasn't about to sit there and listen to him degrade you."

"I think you should leave. I don't know how much more tonight I can handle." She looked down at the floor, she was angry, upset and sad all rolled into one. She didn't want him to leave but knew it was probably for the best tonight.

"Addie, don't be like that. It's my job to protect you. C'mon."

"It's not your job to protect me. You aren't my boyfriend, husband, old man or whatever the hell you want to call it. We aren't back together, Juice. We are figuring things out."

Juice just looked at her blankly. He wasn't sure how to react to that statement. She was right, he wasn't any of those things to her anymore and he seemingly messed up the chance to be one of those things to her again. He headed out, not looking back at her. He knew when to leave well enough alone, and this was when to do that.

-

It had been about a week since Addalyn had heard from either Juice or Scott. All she had wanted was some space and now she was feeling lonely. She wasn't sure if she had pushed Juice away for good, but she wasn't going to go crawling to him to check. He needed to realize that this time was on her terms.

Just as she had walked in the house her cell phone rang. She looked down and had no idea whose number it was. She usually didn't answer unknown numbers but decided to this time.

"Hello?" She asked wearily.

"Addalyn? It's Tara. Tara Knowles." Addalyn had been pretty friendly with Tara. She had just recently come back into Jaxs' life before the shit hit the fan with her and Juice.

"Oh, hi." She wasn't sure what Tara could possibly want.

"I'm sorry to bother you, but I know Juice doesn't have any family or anyone else around here. The guys got arrested the other night. Something happened while in jail and Juice got shanked. He's in pretty rough shape. They transferred him to St. Thomas. I just wanted to let you know, in case you wanted to check on him."

Her heart sank, this was exactly the way things used to be. She worried about this day coming. It scared the shit out of her. She had to make sure he was alright.

"Oh. Ok, um thanks. I'll make my way in there now."

"Well visiting hours are over until morning, but if you tell them you're his spouse they'll let you see him. He's on the third floor. Room 309"

"Alright. Thanks, Tara."

She hung up and rushed into the bedroom to change her clothes. No wonder why she hadn't heard from him. She prayed that he would be alright. She couldn't have something happen to him.

She threw on a pair of dark blue boot cut jeans and a plain white tight t-shirt, slipped on some ballet flats and headed out the door with her purse and car keys. She slid into her red three series BMW and zipped off to the hospital.

-

She arrived at the hospital and made her way to the third floor like Tara had told her. She looked around for any sign of someone who may question her presence there. She noticed no one.

She found his room and pushed on the door, letting herself in. The scene in front of her broke her heart. There he was, lying on his left side with bandages wrapped around his torso. He was sleeping but still had a pained look on his face. She didn't want to wake him but had the sudden urge to kiss him, just be able to touch him and make sure he was still alive. It was at that moment that she knew she wanted him back, truly back in her life 100%. Seeing him lying there made her realize that she would be lost without him again, and she couldn't stand the thought of something worse then this happening to him.

Juice started to stir just as a nurse walked in. The nurse stopped in her tracks at the sight of Addalyn. "I'm sorry miss, but visiting hours are over. You can come back in the morning and see Mr. Ortiz."

She wasn't leaving his side, not tonight, not with him in this condition. "I'm his wife. I just got out of work and came as soon as I could to see him."The nurse nodded and allowed her to stay.

Juice had heard her exchange with the nurse. He was so happy that she was there to see him. He had worried that because he hadn't seen her or called her since their argument that she would give up on him. The thought of her being his wife made his heart do somersaults.

He opened his eyelids and saw her sitting in the chair right next to the bed. Addalyn let out a sigh of relief when she saw his dark brown eyes look over to her.

"Hi." He whispered, still in quite a bit of pain.

"Hi." She reached over and grabbed his hand "I'm so glad you're alive. Tara called me, told me what happened."

He wasn't sure how Tara knew to call her, but he didn't care right now. All he cared about was that she was sitting there next to him, touching him.

He went to speak but was cut off by her before he could say anything. "Juan, I love you. You can't let stuff like this happen, you have to come home to me in one piece every night."

If he wasn't in so much pain he would have jumped up and down on the bed. Not only did she call him Juan, which meant she opened her heart to him, but she told him she loved him. He couldn't express how he felt.

He patted the bed next to him and motioned for her to climb in. She reluctantly agreed, afraid she would cause him more pain but he reassured her she wouldn't. He wrapped one arm around her and whispered in her ear "I love you more, Addie. Thank you."


	7. Chapter 7

Thank you everyone who is reading. I'm trying to channel the old Juice through this story as I'm not so sure how I feel about the Juice we witnessed at the end of Season 6. He's very lost and empty now, so I'm trying to remember the happier times :)

Juice was released from the hospital 4 days later. The guys had been released from prison on bail and Juice was able to go home instead of back to the jail, which he was very relieved about. He couldn't wait to get out of there.

Addalyn had been by his side every chance she got. It was like a switch in her head had flipped. She knew she may be venturing down a dangerous path by letting him back in so easily, but the picture of him lying helpless in that hospital bed alone broke her.

The couple hadn't had the discussion yet about where Juice's "home" would be once he was released. He was afraid to push Addalyn too far by asking to come home, but he couldn't bare another lonely night at the clubhouse. Especially since he knew there would be a coming home party for all of them and he wouldn't get much rest.

Addalyn finished getting ready and headed off to the hospital to pick Juice up. She began thinking about what it would be like once he was out. She decided she would bring him to their house. It was still his, hell he still owned it, and now that they were officially back together he should be able to be comfortable at his own home while he was still recuperating.

She made it to St. Thomas and headed in to help him out to the car. He was still pretty sore but he was trying to be a macho man and refuse help. She knew the game he played and wasn't going to let him fool her.

She made it to his room, only to find some of his brothers already there "helping" him.

"C'mon man, let's see the battle scars. Can't be nearly as bad as the one in your ass from your big black boyfriend." Tig tried to reason in a joking manner.

Addalyn listened for a second before making her presence known. Juice hadn't told her the reasoning behind his "accident" and she wasn't ready to pry it from him. She wasn't even sure if she really wanted to know.

The heads of Tig, Bobby and Chibs all swung around in her direction once they noticed Juice smiling like an idiot at someone in the doorway.

"Ey lass. It's good to see you again." Chibs leaned in and hugged her. None of his brothers had known about her being back in the picture yet, she wasn't surprised they didn't know. She hadn't ran into them yet.

"It's good to see you too, Chibs." She pulled back from him and smiled at the other two men "Hi Tig, Hi Bobby."

"Hey sweetheart. How have you been? Taking care of our Juicy boy here I see." Bobby winked at her and then smiled at Juice.

"Trying to." She kept it short. She wasn't sure how much they knew about her and Juice's breakup so she was a little nervous.

"Alright Juicy, we'll leave you and the lady to get outta here. We'll see you tonight. Will we see you tonight, Miss Addalyn?" Tig questioned, looking at her with a look only Tig could give. In a weird way, she had missed it.

"Yea, we'll be there." Juice answered for both of them.

The men piled out of the room and Juice headed to the bathroom to get dressed, but not before giving her a quick kiss on the lips. "Just let me get dressed and we'll get the hell out of this shit hole."

"Need any help? I know you're still in some pain and don't try to pretend you're not." She giggled as he rolled his eyes. She still knew him better then he knew himself.

"No, I don't need any help getting dressed, but I will need help later getting UNdressed." He stressed the UN part and chuckled as she swatted his backside before he hustled into the bathroom. It was refreshing to feel like the same couple they used to be, he just hoped that feeling lasted.

Juice was going to ask where she was taking him, but he knew the route very well. It was the route to the house, not the clubhouse. He hated being in a cage, but he knew Addalyn would NEVER let him ride his bike home from the hospital, so he just let her drive him and never even questioned it.

"Do you need to get some stuff from your dorm room now?" She asked him like him coming back home was nothing. He went along with it, afraid if he said the wrong thing he would spook her.

"Nah, I can just get stuff later when we head there for the party."

"About that…"she was nervous to tell him she didn't want to go, she couldn't even use work as an excuse because it was Saturday night and she didn't have classes on Saturday's during the summer. "I don't know if I feel up to it. We just got back together, I'm not sure I'm ready to see everyone else yet."

"C'mon babe. It will be fun. The guys will be fine and you'll get to see Tara too. I want you there with me. Please?" He reached across the center console and laced her fingers with his.

"You know you shouldn't be drinking yet. Especially with the pain killers they gave you." She was trying to think of every possible way out of this, but she knew deep down it wasn't going to work.

"I'll be fine, I won't drink that much. Just say yes, please Addie?" She glanced over at him and he gave her his famous puppy dog eyes and pouty lip. How could she resist?

"Alright." He smiled at his victory.

Juice had a few clean clothes at the house that Addalyn must have dug out from wherever she kept them after he had left. He had a pair of pants and a white t-shirt. That was all he needed aside from his cut. He got dressed and waited on Addalyn. He wished he could take the bike, but it was still at the clubhouse and he knew Addalyn would not take him there earlier to get it right after leaving the hospital. He would have to bring it home tonight.

Juice sat on the couch waiting for Addalyn. She emerged from the bedroom and he almost choked on his own spit. She had tight black leggings on, knee high black boots and a lime green flowing chiffon top. Her hair was pulled into a low, messy bun and her make-up was lightly touched up. He hadn't seen her like this in a long time, and he couldn't believe that she was all his, still baring the tattoo to prove it.

"I'm ready." She breezed past him, not noticing that he hadn't taken his eyes off of her since she walked into the room.

She headed over to the counter where her clutch sat and her car keys. He snatched them out of her hands. "I'm driving, I don't need anyone waiting on me anymore."

She didn't answer him, she knew it was hard for him to let others wait on him so she decided to let him take charge.

The clubhouse was packed. Addalyn felt a wave of nervousness rush over her as they exited the car. Juice could tell by the expression on her face that she was a little overwhelmed, it had been a while since she had been here during a party.

He walked around to her side of the car, grabbed her and gave a slight squeeze reassuring her that it would be alright. She glanced at him and flashed a faint smile before following him through the doors.

The party was still raging at 2:00 am. Things were going pretty smoothly. All the guys had made a point to say hello and talk to Addalyn for a little bit. They had missed her being around. Especially seeing Juice back to his normal self now that she was back.

She had spent most of the night talking toTara. She had missed having an actual person around her age to talk with. She loved the girls at the studio, but when the night was over they went their separate ways, never really interacting outside of work.

She was getting tired and a little drunk. It had been a long time since she had spent a night drinking. She looked over at Juice, who was already eyeing her. He nodded his head towards the door and she shook her head yes in response. He immediately stood up and said his good byes to his brothers.

Addalyn said good night to Tara and followed Juice out the door. "Leave your car here tonight, we'll get it in the morning. We can take the bike home." Juice had kept his promise of not excessively drinking, especially once he noticed Addalyn had been doing her share of it.

She just shook her head in agreement and headed to his bike. He climbed on, handed her his helmet and helped her swing her foot over and get situated.

The roar of the engine purred in her chest and she relished the feeling. It was something she hadn't even noticed she missed as much as she had. Juice threw the kickstand up and she snaked her arms around his waist and pulled herself as close to him as she could.

They barely made it through the front door. Their hands were all over each other. Their lips hadn't parted since they both hopped off the bike in the driveway. Juice didn't know if he would be able to make it to the bedroom, he wanted her and wanted her that instant.

He slid his cut off before picking her up and wrapping her legs around his waist, carrying her to the couch. No, he knew he wasn't going to make it to the bedroom. He laid her down on the couch. He sat up and slowly unzipped each boot, making sure to take his time and caress each of her strong calves with his hands. She gazed at him while biting her lower lip. She knew it drove him over the edge when she did that.

He couldn't take it anymore. He ripped her leggings off her sleek legs, revealing to him that she had chosen to wear no panties this particular night. The thought of her wrapped around him on the bike with nothing on under the thin layer of material drove him wild. Before he could even think about removing the fabric that covered her upper body he needed to taste her. He missed the taste of her and was craving her.

He kneeled on the floor while pulling her body to the edge of the couch. She knew what he was about to do. He was a master at it and her body was aching in anticipation. He dipped his head between her legs and gently pressed his tongue to her most sensitive area. He felt her buck underneath him and tried to hold her steady. He continued his assault on her. He swirled and contorted his tongue in ways she didn't even know were possible.

She couldn't take it anymore, she needed to have him inside of her that second. She pulled on his arms, signaling to him that she wanted him. He stood up and rid himself of his pants and boxers. He didn't even have time to take his shirt off before she yanked him down to her. He positioned himself over her and entered her, not slowly and gently like the last time but this time hard and rough. He began pounding into her and he could tell she was already nearing her release. He flipped them over and watched her perched atop of him, riding him into her ecstasy. Seeing her toss her head back and call out in pleasure made him lose himself inside of her.

He looked at her, a look of pure bliss and content on her face. He was more in love with her then he ever thought he could be and he hoped he would never lose her again.


	8. Chapter 8

* Just want to say a big thank you, again, to everyone who favorites, follows and reviews! Although, I wish more readers would review and let me know what you think, it would help me know if I'm doing a good job for you guys! It truly makes my day when I see these things and motivates me to continue, even when I'm not always feeling it. This chapter is a little different from what really happens in the show. I am including some familiar characters, but the events will be totally different. Just try and go with it, please.

It had been almost two months since Juice and Addalyn had reconciled and Juice moved back in. Addalyn had never gotten the chance to explain things to Scott. She had tried to call him a few times but he never answered or responded. She assumed he was angry about how things went down and had just removed himself from her life completely. She hadn't seen him or his niece at the dance studio lately, either.

Addalyn was cleaning the house, something she had to do more often now that Juice was home. He, at times, made a conscious effort to pick up after himself. But now with the two of them again it just seemed there was more to do. She thought about everything that had happened between them. She went from not seeing Juice for 8 months, to living with him again. It was crazy how just a few days could change things yet things felt like they had never changed. She had struggled with herself about letting him back in so easily, it had kept her up at night the first few nights he was back in the house. But she couldn't help it, she wasn't sure if it would turn out to bite her in the ass but right now the feeling was too wonderful to worry about.

Juice had left fairly early that morning, more "club shit" as he referred to it. He usually was gone most of the day and didn't get to see Addalyn until she got home from the studio. It made her content to know he would be coming home to her every night, whether they saw each other much during the day or not.

It was almost June, which meant she was almost done with work for the summer. She always made sure to give herself a small break as to not burn herself out. By this time of the year she looked forward to the ending recitals for the kids and then some time to herself. It meant she might have more time to spend with Juice.

As Addalyn was making the bed she heard the creak of a door open. She paused with the comforter in hand and listened for a second, thinking maybe Juice was home and trying to surprise her. She heard nothing.

"Must have been the tv.."

She shook the comforter and spread it over the bed sheets. While she was bent over tucking in the corners she felt an arm snake around her waist.

"Babe, stop." She straightened up and turned around to notice it wasn't Juice who was holding her. She tried to scream but he silenced her with a fist to the head before any noise could come out.

Juice was beyond pissed, anger and rage would be the more fitting terms. A real Son would never have his kutte stolen. He was going to make Salazar wish he was never born for not only giving him a good beating, but humiliating him by stealing from him.

The club was still reeling from Abel's kidnapping and now this Mayan/Calaveras shit was happening. They just couldn't catch a break. He felt bad he hadn't filled Addalyn in on anything that was going down, and was surprised she hadn't already known about Abel from Tara. He figured once he took on look at her with the cuts on his face he would have a lot of explaining to do.

He made it home and saw that no lights were on, which was strange because even while she was gone Addalyn always left the light over the kitchen sink on. He figured she must have been in a rush to get to the studio and forgot the light.

Just as he was making his way up the steps he heard someone calling for him. "Juice! Juice!" He turned around and noticed a younger girl he didn't recognize.

"Hey. Is Addalyn here? She hasn't shown up at the studio yet and she usually is early. We're getting kinda worried about her." She paused noticing the questioning look on his face. "I'm Samantha by the way, I teach at the studio."

"Um.. I haven't been inside yet but I haven't heard from her today." His heart was starting to race, it wasn't like Addalyn to just not show up at the studio.

He unlocked the door and looked around. He thought about pulling his gun out, but that Samantha girl was following him in and he didn't know how she would react.

He didn't notice anything. Nothing was out of place in the kitchen or living room. He knew her car was still in the driveway so she couldn't have gone too far.

"Wait here, I'll go look around." He ordered Samantha.

He headed to the bedrooms and peeked into two of them, still noticing nothing. He checked the bathroom, still nothing. He was starting to panic. It was like she vanished into thin air.

He finally made it to their bedroom. He immediately noticed the comforter was missing off the bed. As he rounded the corner of the king size mattress he spotted it, a large blood stain on the carpet.

"Jesus Christ" he muttered to himself.

It was the only evidence, other than the missing comforter, he found.

The color drained from his face as he made his way back out to the living room. He didn't know what to do or where to start. He had no idea what happened, if Addalyn was even alive and who would have come into his house.

Samantha noticed the look on Juice's face and knew something was very wrong. "You need to get out of here." He looked at her blankly. He needed time to figure this all out and needed the help of his brothers.

"Is Addalyn ok?" She questioned, worry and anxiety clear in her voice.

"Just go back to the studio, send everyone home for the night and lock up. I'll let you know when I know something." Juice led the girl out the door and flipped open his burner. He called Chibs and begged him to hurry and get to the house. He had one person in mind that was capable of doing this and he was going to find him and kill him.

Addalyn awoke from her state of unconsciousness. Her head felt like it had been bounced off of concrete. She was tied to a post and recognized the space to be an attic of a house. She noticed her own comforter was wrapped around her body, her waist up being the only things exposed.

She couldn't remember anything. The last thing she knew was someone had grabbed her from behind in her own house. She never got a look at the person before she was knocked out.

She tried desperately to wiggle her wrists and free them of the rope that secured them. It was then a younger, Hispanic looking man walked into the attic space with a younger woman trailing him. He had a beard and dark brown eyes. His nose had a piece of white medical tape over it and bared two black eyes.

"I see sleeping beauty is awake." He taunted as he made his way over to her.

He kneeled in front of her. "Sorry sweetheart, but I had to use you to get what I want. Maybe now they'll all listen to me." He whispered, remorse clearly absent from his voice.

Addalyn didn't make a sound or a move. She had no idea who this man was or what he was planning on doing to her.

"I need a phone number. NOW!" He yelled at her.

"A phone number for who? I don't know who you are."

The man chuckled. "Seems as if your old man has left you out of the loop. I don't want to spoil the surprise for you. Just give me a phone number for your old man." He pulled a knife from behind his back and taunted Addalyn with it.

The younger woman in the back stood silently, just eyeing Addalyn.

Addalyn wasn't sure which number to give. Juice wouldn't answer his burner if he didn't recognize the number and she didn't know any other members number. There was only one number that stuck out in her brain and she knew someone would answer it.


	9. Chapter 9

*As always I only own O/C Addalyn, everything else belongs to KS. Also- like I said before, the characters will be the same but the situations will stray from the actual storyline in the show.  
I know I say this EVERY chapter but thank you so much to those who follow and favorite. I wish more readers would review and let me know what they think, like or don't like but as long as people are reading I guess that's a good sign! It's going to be a long wait until September but we all get to wait patiently together :)

Her phone vibrated violently on the counter, almost knocking it onto the floor. She hurried over to it, hoping it would be some news about Abel. She looked at the screen, not recognizing the number.

"Hello?"

Silence held the line for a moment and Tara repeated herself. "Hello?"

He heard a voice in the background. "This isn't your old man, bitch!"

Then she heard a familiar voice "She will be able to get in touch with him, please just tell her what you need." She could tell it was Addalyn and it sounded like she was in some sort of trouble.

Tara tried to get the callers attention "Is anyone there? This is Dr. Knowles. Hello?"

"Listen bitch, I need you to tell this senorita's old man that Salazar has what he's looking for and if he wants to see her again still breathing, and his kutte, he will call back this number to find out what he has to do."

And with that the caller hung up. Tara was shaking. She remembered Jax mentioning that name, Salazar, after the shooting at Half- Sacks funeral. She had to get in touch with Juice, she just hoped Addalyn would still be alive by the time she did.

*******

Juice paced the length of the reaper table that adorned the chapel. All of his brothers were there, not knowing where to even start looking for Addalyn.

"It had to be Scott." He just couldn't fathom who else would have taken her.

"Who's Scott?" Jax questioned.

"This guy she was seeing before we got back together. He was a real douchebag. I punched him in the face one night because he called Addalyn a whore. Before he left he told her that this wasn't over. It has to be him"

"What do you know about this guy? Anything?" Chibs chimed in.

"Not much. I know what he drives and what he looks like."

The guys groaned, it seemed to be a dead end street. Just as Clay was about to call and end to their meet there was a knock on the door. She peeked her head in.

"Sorry to interrupt. Juice," she looked him in the eyes from across the room and could see the pain in them. "I have something to tell you about Addalyn."

The men motioned for her to enter the room, a place where women were very, very rarely allowed.

Jax spoke up "What is it Tara? Do you know where she is?"

"I got a call from this guy, Salazar. He told me to tell Juice if he wanted to see Addalyn and his kutte again he would call him back. I have the number." Tara scrolled through her phone, highlighting the random number.

Juice snatched it out of her hands. He didn't ask her any questions, he just pressed send as fast as he could, putting it on speaker and setting it on the table. They were already on borrowed time.

*******

Addalyn was still tied to the post and was getting hot, thirsty and hungry. She could tell it had to be almost dark by now and if Juice didn't realize she was gone yet the girls at the studio would.

She had to figure a way out of this. If she only could find something to loosen the rope she could probably slip her wrists right out of it. As she was scanning the room she heard footsteps making their way towards the room she was in. Just as she was about to give up hope she noticed a screw driver not too far out of reach from her left foot.

The footsteps were getting heavier and louder. She had to act quickly. She stretched her left leg out as far as she could and was able to rake the screw driver into her. She lifted herself up and sat on it just as Salazar walked through the door.

"I haven't heard from your old man yet, must be he doesn't care about seeing you again, at least alive anyways." Just as he finished his sentence the phone in his right hand rang.

He flipped it open. "Speak of the devil, I was just telling your old lady that you wouldn't care if you saw her alive again."

"Salazar, I swear to God if you do anything to her …"

Salazar cut him off "You need to shut up and listen or else there won't be anything but a body for you to find!"

Juice stopped talking, he couldn't lose Addalyn.

"If you want the girl and your kutte back you need to kill Alvarez and bring me proof that he is dead."

Juice shook his head, the demand was impossible. "That's not possible, you know that."

"Well then, I guess your life as a single man will start after I hang up this phone."

Juice heard Addalyn scream. "Wait," he yelled.

Salazar heard Juice stop him over Addalyn's screams. He knew that would sway Juice's decision. "You have until 11:30 tonight to kill him and drop the proof off in Charming park. Once I see that it's done and know it's real I will call you back and let you know where I left your property." With that he hung up.

Juice let out a sigh and dropped his head into his hands. He knew that this was impossible. Killing Alvarez meant a war, a war they couldn't start or fight.

Jax saw the pain Juice was in. It was almost as much pain as he was in while searching for Abel. "I'll go talk to Alvarez. You use your computer shit to see if you can track that number or something." He stood up and headed for the door, patting Juice on the back as he passed.

*****

"I guess we'll find out in a few hours if your old man really wants you around." Salazar chuckled and walked out of the room.

Addalyn let out the breath she didn't realize she had been holding. She lifted herself off the screw driver and tried to scoot it back far enough so her hands could reach it.

Once she was able to grab it she shoved it into the knot that linked her wrists to the post and began wiggling. After what seemed like an eternity, she was loosened the knot. Her breathing started to pick up, she hadn't thought about what she would do once she was able to free herself.

She jiggled her wrists out and couldn't believe she had done it. She reached around and rubbed the marks that adorned them. She had nothing, no phone, and no money. She wasn't sure how she would get anywhere but that was the least of her worries. If he saw that she was free he would beat her or worse, kill her.

She grabbed the screw driver, planning to use it as her only source of protection if necessary, and warily made her way towards the small attic door.

She tried to listen for him. All she heard was silence. She made her way towards the stairs. She could see the front door.

Just as she tried to make a run, Salazar's girlfriend, who's named she learned was Luisa, confronted her at the bottom of the stairs. Addalyn turned around to run back up, Luisa chased her.

Addalyn reached the top and turned around. Luisa went to grab her by the hair and she reacted. She plunged the screw driver into the young woman's abdomen and then droped it to the floor. Luisa yelped and bent over, clutching the place where the blood was spilling out of.

Addalyn was in shock, she never thought she would be able to hurt anyone. As she watched Luisa fall to her knees, she grabbed her weapon and ran down the stairs towards the door.

Salazar heard the commotion and came out into the front room from the kitchen. He saw Addalyn's disappearing figure out the front door and heard Luisa gasping for air at the top of the stairs.


	10. Chapter 10

*Thank you for reading, favorites, follows and reviews. I think people are enjoying this, I'm not sure though. If you guys like it, or even if you're not, please let me know! Enjoy!*

He wasn't sure which one to go to first. He watched Addalyn run as fast as she could, disappearing into the night, occasionally spotting her figure under the street lights. He rushed up the stairs to Luisa's side, but by the time he reached the front steps she had already taken her last breath.

He flipped open his phone, teetering on the edge of hysterics at losing Luisa. "She took off. I don't know how she got loose but she's making a run for it." He slammed the phone shut, tears flowing like a river down his cheeks.

*****

Addalyn wasn't sure where she was. She didn't recognize anything, not a landmark, nothing. She was out of breath and her lungs felt like they could burst at any second but she couldn't stop running, she was sure someone was chasing her and she couldn't give them the chance to catch her. Not willingly anyway.

She was covered in blood. She knew she had killed that girl, but it was kill or be killed and she wasn't going to suffer the latter. Her mind raced, she could barely organize her thoughts into comprehension. Who was Salazar? And what could he possibly think having her would get him from Juice or the club. She heard his deal, to kill Alvarez, and she knew who Alvarez was but couldn't fathom why this guy would want to use her as leverage.

She had no cell phone, no shoes and no money. What the hell was she going to do? She had to find a place. Somewhere she could use a phone. She knew she couldn't go to the police, that Juice and the club is already involved.

*****

Juice's emotions were all over the place. He was terrified he would lose his Addie but enraged once he found out where she was. At times like this he was glad his hacking skills were as pristine as they were.

He tracked the phone number and found an address for Salazar's location. He felt his face boil with heat and anger when he tracked the address and studied the name on the screen. Scott Hallaway. He didn't know Scott's last name, but he knew it was the same Scott.

He motioned for Chibs and Bobby to follow him as he jogged out of the clubhouse and headed towards his bike.  
"Find something, Juicy?" Chibs slid his helmet on and lifted the kickstand.

"I'm going to kill that mother fucker" was all Juice could mutter out.

*******

She couldn't run anymore, she felt like she was going to collapse. She hadn't noticed anyone behind her so she thought it was ok to stop running for a bit. She was lost and alone. She had no way of getting in touch with Juice or Tara or anyone.

She started to break down. The tears came hard and fast as the events of the past hours replayed in her mind. Just as she looked up to try again to recognize any of her surroundings she spotted it.

The white Audi pulled over against the curb where she was hunched over. "Addalyn? Are you ok?"

She looked up, her make-up running down her face from all the crying, and saw his piercing blue eyes even in the darkness. "Scott." Was all she could muster out.

He climbed out of his car, walked around the front, and made his way over to her. He noticed the blood on her shirt. "What happened? Are you alright? Addalyn, answer me please."

She looked up at him, a little unsure of how to respond to him. How could she explain everything to him that happened?

"I'm alright. I just need a phone. I ended up out here and I don't know where I am." She didn't want to tell him about where she just came from and why there was blood all over her.

"Here, just let me give you a ride. I live right down the road a few blocks that way," he pointed in the direction she came from "You can get cleaned up and then call whoever you need to." He hoped his calm demeanor and charm would get her into his car.

Addalyn hesitated but figured it wouldn't hurt. She had no idea where she would go if she didn't go with him or how else she would get in touch with Juice.

She just nodded her head in agreement and let him wrap his right arm under her left and lead her to the car.

They headed down the dark street and came upon a yellow house directly in front of them that she now recognized. This was the house she just escaped! She turned to look at Scott, he bared an evil grin.

"You thought you could just run back into your biker's arms? You're mine, Addalyn. Have been since I laid eyes on you at the dance studio." He had a eerie calm in his voice and that terrified Addalyn more then him being angry did.

*******

Juice sped through the streets, making his way past the "Now leaving Charming" sign and the "Welcome to Lodi" one. He wasn't sure how much longer he had before the deadline but he knew he had to make it to that address before they hurt Addalyn.

He soared down side streets and alleys, coming upon the place he was looking for. A yellow house at the end of Livingston street. He spotted the white Audi in the driveway and couldn't believe that Scott would be working with Salazar.

He almost dumped his bike in his effort to get into the house as quickly as he could. He drew his gun with Chibs and Bobby following suit. The senior members made their way around to the back of the house while Juice approached the front door.

He noticed it wasn't fully closed, which made his entrance easier and undetectable. It was then that he heard muffled screams, familiar screams, coming from an upstairs room. Just as he made his way up the first step he spotted Salazar coming from the kitchen.

Salazar drew his gun but Juice was quicker and shot him in the chest. The gunshot brought Chibs and Bobby running into the house. Juice didn't take the time to see if he was dead, he had little time as he knew that Scott now was aware of someone else's presence in the house.

He rushed to one of the bedrooms and found Addalyn tied to each of the bed posts. Her pants pulled down to her ankles and her shirt tattered. She looked over at him and relief flooded her body. She had never been happier to see him in her life.

Juice ran to the bed and tried to untie the ropes holding her hands and feet. Her mouth was duct taped. He needed to free her. He reached for the knot around her left wrist when he noticed a figure appear out of the corner of his eye.

Scott was pointing his gun right at Juice's head. "You're not taking her back again. She's mine. So leave her where she is and you will live."

Juice panicked trying to think of a way to hurt Scott first. He was vulnerable, he had put his gun down to help Addalyn and now was left standing there at Scott's mercy.

Scott moved closer and just as his finger started to put a little pressure on the trigger Juice felt blood splatter on his face. He opened his eyes, not realizing he had shut them, and searched Addalyn for any wounds. She had none and he searched himself. Still none. He looked down and saw Scott lying on the floor, blood pooling around his head.

Chibs entered the room and put down his smoking gun. "Let's get you outta here, 'ey lass?"


	11. Chapter 11

*hope you guys are still enjoying this.*

It had been a week since the incident and Juice finally exposed everything that had been going on with the club. How Salazar jumped him and stole his kutte, Abel had been kidnapped and they were still searching for him and how they may have a lead on his whereabouts. He told her they may be making a trip to Ireland to find the baby.

She felt like her head was spinning. She hadn't been able to sleep. Scott's face haunted her dreams. She was nauseas and had made the porcelain God one of her closest friends. She was jumpy and anytime Juice approached her from behind she just about took him out with an elbow to the nose.

To top all of the stress off, she had missed her period. She noticed she hadn't gotten it the previous month, but she was late a lot so she didn't really think much of it. Now with everything else that had happened, she just assumed it was related to stress. But she knew she needed to be sure. She had to take a test, to put her mind at ease.

Juice was worried about her. She was a mess. He knew she hadn't been sleeping. He could feel her toss and turn all night next to him. He tried everything he could to comfort her, assure her that he wouldn't let anything like this happen to her ever again, but he couldn't fathom what she was going through on the inside. He just hoped it didn't push her away.

-Break-

Addalyn was glad she had teachers at the studio she could rely on. She hadn't been feeling up to teaching, which made her even more upset. She loved dancing but with the trauma of the kidnapping and the way her body was reacting she knew she would only bring the mood of the girls and the kids down.

She waited until Juice was gone to the clubhouse and headed to the Morton's drugstore. Praying she didn't run into anyone she knew, she slipped down the aisle, grabbed the first pregnancy test she spotted and bolted for the cash register.

She was so relived to make it back home unnoticed. It had been her first outing alone since the incident and she didn't need any questions or curious eyes boring into her skull.

She made it through the front door and made sure to lock it behind her. She was very conscious of that now. She set her purse and the small plastic bag down on the counter. "Well, I guess it's now or never." She took the test out of the bag and headed for the bathroom. She knew it was best to do this without Juice here, there was no need to alarm him yet.

She took the test to the bathroom, did the deed and was left with nothing to do but wait. The three minutes seemed like an eternity. Her entire fate was left hinged on that little plastic indicator. Her mind wandered off to thoughts of what ifs. What if she is pregnant? What will Juice think? They hadn't been back together more than two months. Will he want to keep the baby? What if he isn't ready and wants her to get rid of it? Could she do that?

She rid herself of those twisted thoughts. She needed to find out first before diving into all those questions.

She looked down at the test. Pregnant.

"Shit."

-Break-

The guys broke from church and Juice was not looking forward to going home. It wasn't that he didn't want to see Addalyn, he was dreading telling her the news. The club got a lead on Abel's whereabouts and their suspicion of him being in Ireland was right. Now they were making plans to get over there and save him. That wasn't the worst part. Clay, Jax, Bobby, Tig and himself were going back to prison. Jax delivered the blow during church. They had until they came back from Ireland and then they would be taken into custody and have to serve fourteen months. How was he going to break all of this to Addalyn?

He made his way home that night by way of a long ride out of town. He had to figure out how to tell her and pray to God she didn't leave him. Fourteen months is a long time to wait for someone and he wasn't sure she would be able to handle being alone again, not after what happened to her. He also had to tell her that he had to go to Ireland and that they would be taken into custody as soon as they got back. He knew he was venturing down a path that may end them for good.

He finally made it home. It was late and he hoped maybe Addalyn was asleep and he could push off telling her until morning. He noticed the living room lights on and knew she was not sleeping.

He walked through the front door, took off his kutte that he had gotten back from inside Scotts house, and hung it up. He walked into the living room and spotted her, sprawled out on the couch with a blanket and watching The Big Bang Theory. She turned her head towards where he was standing.

"Hey." She felt her insides churn. She knew she had to break the news to him and couldn't understand why she was so nervous. This was her Juan, she knew him inside and out. If he loved her as much as he says he would be happy.

"Hey babe." He made his way over to the couch and pushed his way next to her. He planted a soft kiss on her lips.

"How was your night?" He asked. He wasn't sure if she had decided to go back to the studio. He knew she had been taking some time off, but thought maybe she had changed her mind.

"Alright. I didn't do much, just hung out here. There's some beef goulash on the stove if you're hungry."

"Thanks." His hands were shaking, he didn't know how to go about this.

Just as he started in she cut him off. "I have to tell you something. But before you respond I want you to think, don't just start talking." She didn't want him to fly off the handle right away.

Juice nodded, encouraging her to continue. "I took a test today because I was late, and I know I'm late a lot so I wasn't too worried about it before…" she was rambling, something she did often when she was nervous and he could tell. "I'm pregnant."

Juice felt a shock to his system. Did she just say those two words? She's pregnant. With his kid. He wasn't sure how to feel. He wasn't angry by any means, he was just dumbfounded.

Addalyn studied the look of surprise on his face and felt the need to elaborate "I had gone off the birth control after we broke up, I just didn't think I would need it. And that night you showed up here the thought just never crossed my mind."

Juice's mind went to her being pregnant and having his baby while he's in prison. He knew he really needed to tell her, but he just couldn't bring himself to.

"Babe," he reached over and grabbed her hands "I love you. I've always loved you and I've wanted to have a family with you. It's a little sooner then expected, but we'll make it work." He released her and his strong, calloused hands went to her stomach. He let his worries go for a minute and felt a rush of happiness come over him. She was carrying his child. A product of their love for each other was growing inside of her.

Addalyn was relived at his response. She was surprised he was taking it so well, and could finally relax and allow herself to be happy about it. She sat up and leaned into him, planting the most searing kiss on his hot lips.

She wasn't sure why but she had felt like she never wanted him more than she did right now. Her hands made their way up his strong, caramel colored arms and came to a rest on his taut chest. Every feel of his body beneath her fingers was turning her on more and more.

She stood up and grabbed his hand, leading him towards their bedroom.

Juice knew he should tell her everything, but he didn't want to ruin the moment. He was about to make love to the mother of his child. He wanted to relish in that feeling for a bit.


	12. Chapter 12

He couldn't sleep. The clock on the nightstand next to him said 2:25. He felt like he had been lying in that bed for an eternity. He tried not to move. Addalyn was resting on his chest and finally having a restful sleep. He didn't want to disturb her.

At this hour of the night he was his own worst enemy. He tried to think of how things would be in the next fourteen months. He would be locked up and Addalyn would have to do all of this on her own, well at least without him. She still had the rest of the club, that wasn't going to change. He would go into prison with an old lady and come out with a kid.

And then there was the fact he would have to leave her for who knows how long to go to Belfast. He knew she couldn't come, the studio was still winding down and whether she was there teaching or not she would still need to set up and direct the recital.

"There has to be a way I can get out of going." He thought to himself. He just had to find a way to spend a little more time with her before he was locked up. She needed him, it was apparent by her reaction to his thoughts on the baby.

His ADD was kicking in hard now. His mind focused on that word, baby. He couldn't believe he was going to be a father. He hoped it was a girl, a beautiful baby girl who looked just like his Addie and would also have him wrapped around her finger just like her she did. He already felt like a failure as a father, he had to leave his family during the most important time. He wouldn't be there to hold the baby for the first time, or hear its first cries. His heart was aching, he was already letting Addalyn and his baby down.

His brain then focused on her. She was everything he could ever want in a woman and more. She stood by him through all the shit in New York, left with him for California no questions asked, stayed by his side through his prospect days and patch in. Dealt with all the bullshit of the club and him being gone from her 99% of the time. There are very few women who could put up with their man putting his brothers first, but she did it and did it with a smile on her face. She had waited for him, well practically waited for him, after he lost her for those long eight months.

He wanted to do something, show her she meant more to him then just his old lady. Being an old lady was a position not to be disrespected, but he wanted those who didn't know anything about the club to still know she was taken. He wanted to marry Addalyn. He knew he had to do it before he went away.

-Break-

The morning sun broke through the curtains and slapped Juice in the face. He felt like he had just fallen asleep when he felt Addalyn move to face him, he could feel her staring at him.

She began kissing him softly along his jaw. She traveled down his neck, placing her hot lips on him almost every inch of the way. She continued her assault on him, making sure to kiss each tattoo that adorned his rigid body. He tried to savor this moment, it wouldn't be too long before he would be in a cold cell clutching his pillow instead of her naked body.

After the couple had made love for the third time in less than 24 hours Juice knew it was time to break the news.

He rolled over on his side to face her. She looked up at him with the sweetest smile on her face and he felt like he was about to shatter her heart, just like he had done before.

"I need to talk to you about something." He grabbed her hand, he wanted to hold onto her forever.

"Ok…" she looked at him hesitantly, she was a little nervous.

"I have to go back inside. Lowen couldn't get the charges against us dropped, we got the charge reduced but we have to do time, 14 months."

He saw her face drop. Her smiled faded into sadness. He hated to hurt her like this.

"Oh." She couldn't form any other words. She was losing him again.

"I'm so sorry babe, I want to be here with you through everything with the baby, but at least the time isn't as long as it could have been." He wanted her to look on the bright side, at least he wasn't doing 10-20.

"When do you have to go?" She hoped it wouldn't be for a while, she needed him.

"Well that's the thing, they kinda want to take us in as soon as possible. But…" he stopped, he was about to drop another bomb on her. "we're supposed to fly to Belfast. Jax got a call that Abel is there and we have to go get him back."

His words were like another dagger in the heart. She wanted them to save Abel, she had no idea what she would do if it were her child, but she needed time with Juice.

"Who is going? Everyone?" She hoped he would say everyone but him.

"Everyone but Piney, Tig and Kozik."

"Oh." She didn't know what to say. She just rolled over and faced the other direction. She didn't want him to see the tears fall from her eyes.

"Babe, look at me. Please." She rolled back over and faced him. He spotted the mist in her eyes and felt like he had just killed her spirit. "I'll do everything I can to stay here with you. I'll talk to Jax."

She cut him off. "No, you have to go. I want you to help find Abel. I would want the rest of the guys to be there if it were our child." Her hand instinctively went to her stomach. Juice noticed and rested his hand on top of hers.

"I'll do everything I can for this baby, whether I'm here or not. I'll do everything for you too. I won't let you down this time." Addalyn just nodded at Juice's words. She felt like this was eight months ago and she was losing him all over again, but this time she would have bigger responsibilities then just taking care of the house.

-Break-

Juice sat at the Reaper table, surrounded by his brothers. They were discussing their Belfast plans. He just couldn't find it in him to even speak, he was a disappointment to his old lady and now his child-to-be. He resented his own father for abandoning him and his mother, but now he felt he was no better.

Jax noticed the anguish on Juice's face "What's up brother? You alright?"

Juice wasn't sure he should share the news, he didn't want to make any of this about him. He knew the pain Jax must be in and finding Abel was the most important thing to all of them right now, but he wasn't sure he could make something believable up either.

The rest of the table fell silent, all eyes were now on him. "Addalyn is pregnant."

He was interrupted by cheers "Aye, Juicy! Tha's great news, ain't it?" Chibs patted him on the back, but eyed him skeptically noticing the sad look on his face.

"Yea, but with going to Belfast and then going inside I won't be there for this baby at all until well after it's born."

Jax chimed in "She ain't going to Belfast with us? We got room for her if she wants to come along."

"She can't. With the studio and shit, she just can't leave."

The guys all nodded, they felt bad for Juice. The talk turned back to Abel after a few more congratulations from Happy, Bobby and Tig.

-Break-

Addalyn sat on the couch wondering what her next move should be. She didn't know how far along she was, she figured she better make an appointment to find out.

She thought about everything Juice had divulged to her that morning, he was leaving her to do this all alone. She wasn't sure if she would be able to do it on her own. She couldn't do anything about him having to go to prison, but he was leaving the country too.

The studio was almost done for the year, she knew as the owner she should be there for the girls. But this was a circumstance no one could have forseen. She needed to be with Juice, especially before he left her to do all the hard work on her own.


	13. Chapter 13

Ch13

"So, Ms. Williams, you're here for your annual check?" Dr. Bond questioned as she walked through the door of the exam room, briefly glancing over Addalyn's chart.

"No, actually. I'm here because I missed my period and I got a positive pregnancy test at home." She fiddled with her fingers, she was nervous. This visit was making everything real.

"Oh, ok. When was your last menstrual cycle?" Dr. Bond grabbed her pen out of her coat pocket and flipped through the chart in front of her.

"Honestly, I think about three months ago. I know I've missed the last couple. You know how my periods are screwy anyway, so the first month I missed it I didn't really think anything of it. But after I missed it this time I decided I should take a test. Plus, I've been kinda sick to my stomach."

"Ok, well, we will do a pregnancy test today and then I will send you over to have an ultra sound so we can determine how far along you are and then set a tentative due date."  
Dr. Bond handed her a cup and pointed her in the direction of the bathroom.

About ten minutes later Dr. Bond re-entered Addalyn's room. "yes, you are in deed, pregnant. Congratulations. I am going to write you a script and send you over to ultra sound right away so we can determine everything. Ok?" Dr. Bond handed her the script and smiled.

"Thank you so much. I do have one question…" she paused. Dr. Bond looked at her urging her to continue. "Can I fly over seas at the point?"

"Yes, normally pregnant women can fly up until they are around 34 weeks as the risk of going into early labor while flying is the greatest from that point on. But at this point you are free to travel."

Addalyn just smiled at her, took her script and made her way to the ultra- sound department.

-Break-

Juice walked in the house and noticed that Addalyn wasn't home yet. He figured she must have decided to work tonight. Which was good, he knew she needed to get out of the house. He glanced at the clock and knew she would be home pretty soon. He didn't like her walking home alone any more, so he made her take her car so he at least knew she would be safe.

He shrugged off his kutte, placing it on the coat hanger next to the door. He made his way into the kitchen and decided to grab a beer. It had been a long day. The club decided they would be leaving the day after tomorrow. He was dreading it. It meant the beginning of his time away from Addalyn. It also meant that the next time he could actually call his house home again there would be three people living there.

He was shaken from his thoughts when he reached the fridge. As his hand reached for the door, he paused when he noticed it. A picture that wasn't hanging there this morning. It was the first picture of their baby. He studied it. It was so tiny and funny looking. It looked like a kidney bean. It was still all so surreal to him. He couldn't believe how he went from living at the club house and dreaming about Addalyn every night for eight months to having a baby together. It was awesome and terrifying at the same time.

Just as he closed the door and unscrewed the top of his beer he heard a car door shut in the garage.

She dragged herself and her bag through the door. She was exhausted and had barely done anything. This pregnancy was kicking her ass already. She had noticed Juice's bike in the garage and was glad he was already home. She just wanted to cuddle with him and watch a movie.

"Hey babe. Here let me take that." He made his way over to her and grabbed her bag from her.

"Thanks." She leaned over and placed a quick kiss on his lips. "Hi."

He couldn't wait to bring up the ultra sound picture. Seeing the baby made him that more excited he was starting a family with the only woman he's ever loved.

"I saw the picture of the little bean." She looked at him quizzically.

"It looks like a kidney bean…." She smiled and it infectiously spread to his lips too.

"Yea, I went to the doctor today. I wanted to find out for sure and find out when I'm due."

He waited for her to continue before jumping in with his questions.

"The ultra sound tech told me I'm about ten weeks, due January 16."

Juice couldn't believe how upset he was at the fact that he wouldn't be there to see this baby born. He wouldn't even be able to go to any appointments with Addalyn. It was breaking his heart piece by piece.

"You ok, babe?" She noticed his face fell from the bright smile to a frown. She worried maybe he was regretting this whole situation.

"Yea, I'm fine. So, is it a boy or a girl?"

"Not sure yet, they told me at my next ultra-sound at 20 weeks they would be able to tell, if we wanted to find out."

"Do you want to know?" He asked her. He knew that he wanted to know, but would leave it up to Addalyn whether or not they would find out.

"I think I want to know. It makes it easier for buying clothes and stuff like that. Do you want to know?"

"I would, but it's whatever you want babe."

"C'mon," she grabbed him by the hand and led him to the couch "right now what I want is to snuggle and watch a movie."

He couldn't argue with her there. He wanted nothing more then to just hold her and never let go.

-Break-

Juice woke up smiling, he could get use to this. The two were naked and tangled up in blankets and each other. Pregnancy obviously agreed with Addalyn, it seemed they had done nothing but have sex. It was something he would NEVER complain about.

His smile quickly faded as he looked down at her sleeping in his arms. He was leaving for Belfast in a few short hours and the thought of her sleeping in this bed all alone while he is so far away from her was killing him.

He hated to wake her up, but he wanted to spend some time with her before he had to go.  
"Babe." He lightly shook her shoulder.

"Mmm.." she just groaned.

"C'mon, I want to spend time with you before I have to leave."

She rolled towards him, opened her beautiful green eyes and looked at him. She rubbed the sleep from her face and smirked.

"I know how we can spend time together." She ran her hands up and down his strong body as she sat up and moved to straddle him.

Oh, yea. He could definitely get used to this.


	14. Chapter 14

thank you everyone for the follows and favs. Please review and let me know how you're feeling about this, I'm kind of losing steam on it. Also, I posted a new story - Take It Out On Me. Please check it out and let me know what you think of it. If you guys like it I'll continue that one as well! Thanks!

Juice was on the verge of tears as he prepared to exit his house. He looked around, thinking about how different things were now then they were just a few months ago. He knew he would be back home, maybe even very briefly before he got shipped off to Stockton, but it still felt like he was leaving for good.

He had already said his goodbyes to Addalyn. That was one of the hardest things he had ever had to do. He knew it was just the beginning of leaving her alone to take care of everything, including their child.

He hadn't gotten the chance to propose. He had gotten so caught up in shit with finding Abel and shit with the Calaveras that he hadn't been able to go get her a ring.

Addalyn said she had some paperwork to take care of at the studio. He understood. He figured she wouldn't want to come to the clubhouse to say goodbye. He had to admit it would even be almost too hard for him if she had.

He walked out the side door into the garage, slung his pack over his shoulders, lifted the kickstand and with the roar of his Dyna he headed for the T-M.

-break-

Addalyn had been able to get away from Juice earlier then he had planned on leaving. She told him she had some paperwork to take care of at the studio but that wasn't the whole truth. She did have to stop by and leave instructions, bank deposit forms and other miscellaneous things for the girls, but really she had to go drop her bag off at the clubhouse without him knowing.

She had talked to Tara and Jax about a week ago and decided she needed to go with Juice. Jax explained to her how depressed Juice had been at church at the thought of leaving her alone. Jax was more then willing to let her come, said it might be good to have another woman along besides Gemma. She knew it was the right decision, she couldn't let him go to Belfast and then to Stockton without spending as much time with him as she could.

She knew the minute he pulled into the lot he would see her car, so she asked Tara if she could meet her at the studio and give her a ride to T-M. Tara wasn't going, had to stay behind for work, but was glad Addalyn was going. The two had become somewhat close over the past couple of months, especially after the kidnapping ordeal.

Tara was still coming into the old lady role and normally looked to Gemma for guidance, but it was nice to have someone more her age who could relate to the now of the club instead of the past.

Addalyn knew she had to be there waiting for Juice when he arrived or else the entire plan would backfire.

Tara pulled into the lot and parked the cutlass. The two women got out and shared a smile before going their separate ways. Addalyn headed off towards Juice's old dorm, she figured he would stop in there to make sure he wasn't missing anything before he left.

-Break-

Juice parked his bike in the row along with the others and climbed off. The van was already there waiting to take them to the hangar. He nodded at the guys, and headed inside the clubhouse to make sure he had everything he would really need.

He came to the door of his old dorm room. He hesitated, thinking for a split second there wouldn't be anything he would need from there, he had brought most everything back home. He decided to double check anyway.

As he opened the door he spotted someone sitting on the bed. It took his brain a second to register that it was Addalyn. She had a bag sitting next to her on the floor.

"What are you doing here?" He questioned, stunned.

"I'm happy to see you too." She chuckled. "I'm going with you…"

"To Belfast?" His head was spinning, she was going with him?

"No, to Stockton. Yes, to Belfast. I already talked to Jax, we've had it planned for me to go for about a week. I couldn't tell you because I wanted to surprise you. Although…" she walked over to him, grabbing his kutte in each of her hands and pulling him into her so that their bodies were lined up perfectly. She could feel him through his jeans, making the teasing almost harder on her then him. "the early morning goodbye was pretty nice. I wouldn't mind that again."

She planted a kiss on his lips that made his toes curl. He returned it with just as much fire as she had, wrapping his arms around her waist. He lifted her up by her tight ass and she instinctively wrapped her legs around him.

Just as they were moving towards the bed a pounding on the door stopped them in their tracks. "Juice, c'mon brother. We're leavin. Let's go." Tig shouted.

Juice set Addalyn down and picked up both his and her bags. Juice had a smile that he didn't think anyone or anything could wipe off his face as they headed for the van.

-Break-

The flight was long and uncomfortable, especially in a cargo plane, but that didn't change Juice's mood. He hadn't taken his hands off her since they boarded. She was now resting her head in his lap, sleeping peacefully like everyone else was besides him.

He started planning, he knew that this was his second chance and he needed to take advantage of it before they got back and he went away. He needed to find a ring suitable for Addalyn and propose to her in the short time they were in Belfast.

The plane landed and everyone dragged themselves off. They had bikes waiting for them, the Belfast charter made sure they were there waiting for all of SAMCRO. The arrangements had been made that all of the guys would stay at a little flat next in an industrial part of town, hoping to go un-noticed by locals and any authorities.

There was also a van waiting. Gemma and Addalyn were instructed to take the van back as the guys were already headed off, chasing a tip Jax got on Abel from one of the Belfast members as soon as they exited the plane.

Gemma hadn't spoken to Addalyn much since she came back into Juice's life. It wasn't that they didn't like each other, Gemma actually had quite a bit of respect for Addalyn. She stuck around through all of the time Juice had invested into prospecting and never once bitched about him putting the club before her. She just wasn't around the clubhouse that often, especially now since Juice moved back home.

"Heard you're pregnant." Gemma looked over at Addalyn who gave her a shy smile in return "That didn't take long. Hope the kid looks more like you then Juicy"

"Yea, well I guess when you've been apart for eight months some things just slip your mind."

Gemma also liked that Addalyn wasn't intimidated by her. "More like things slip into your pants."

Addalyn chuckled "Very true."

"So, when ya due? You're not showing so you can't be too far along."

"January 16. I'm about 10 weeks."

"The guys will be inside, you think you can handle this shit on your own?"

Addalyn winced a bit at Gemma's words. She was trying to forget that part.

"I guess I don't really have a choice. It's either do it alone and wait for him to get out to be a family or do it alone for the rest of my life and the second isn't really an option."

Gemma was proud of her answer. She was definitely a good old lady, one Juice needed to keep around permanently.


End file.
